15
This story has advanced chapters in Patreon.
You can also be a patron, visit my account.
patreon.com/vampiremims
You can use browser kapag hindi niyo po masearch ang account ko.
Subscription starts at 50 pesos per month.
Thank you!
☀️☀️☀️
I wasn't aware that my life was about to change when I found out about Jahann and Cherinna's relationship. Hindi ko akalain na 'yung closeness nila, 'yung palagi silang magkasama may ibang meaning na pala.
"You want me to just accept the fact that you..." tumingin ako kay Jahann na puno ng pagtataka at sakit ang mga mata bago muling tumingin kay Cherinna. "You fell in love with each other?" mabilis kong pinalis ang luha sa mga pisngi ko habang nakatingin sa babae. Hindi ko alam kung pinaglalaruan lang ba nila ako o totoo ang sinabi nilang dalawa.
May relasyon sila...
"No... I'm sorry..." Cherinna reached for my hand but I took a step back. Hindi ako maakapaniwala sa nangyayari ngayon. Hindi ako makapaniwala sa sinasabi nilang nangyayari sa kanilang dalawa. "I am really sorry..."
I looked at her again with pain in my eyes. Everything that happened before flashed back in my mind. Ang pagiging malapit nila, ang closes nila ni Jahann, ang pag-aalaga ni Jahann sa kanya... lahat ng iyon, may meaning!
"Sorry? Sorry, Cherinna?" I asked her while crying. Parang sasabog ang dibdib ko dahil sa sinasabi nito. Hindi ko alam kung paanong tatanggapin ang sorry nito ngayong ang sinasabi nila sa akin ay may relasyon silang dalawa! "Sorry lang 'yung masasagot mo? Sorry?!" I couldn't stop myself and slapped her face again. "Tangina ng sorry mo!"
Jahann tried to stop me but I just kept on pushing him away. I hate them both! I hate them both so much! Hindi ko alam kung paano ko silang dalawa titignan ng hindi ako nakakaramdam ng galit, ng pandidiri.
Hindi ko kaya.
I hugged myself as I walked away from them. Patuloy pa rin ang pagtulo ng luha ko habang patuloy rin sa pagbuhos ang ulan.
Hindi ko alam ngayon kung ano ba ang mararamdaman ko. Galit? Pandidiri?
Mariin kong kinagat ang labi ko habang patuloy ang pagtulo ng luha sa mga pisngi ko. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko ba magagawang bumalik sa bahay namin at harapin silang dalawa ngayon na alam ko na ang totoo sa kanila.
Also, Nikolai... he's their son!
I closed my eyes hard as I sat on the side and hugged my knees. Malakas pa rin ang buhos ng ulan at kanina pa ako basang-basa ngunit parang wala na sa akin iyon dahil sa bigat ng nararamdaman ko.
For the first time in my life, I slapped Cherinna. I never imagined this time would come, but I also never imagined they would love each other the same way Theon loves Lean.
That is so fucked up!
Hindi nila naisip si Mommy? Si Daddy? Ako? Hindi nila naisip ang pamilya namin sa ginawa nilang dalawa. Hindi nila naisip na magkakagulo kaming lahat?
They're so selfish!
Iniyuko ko lang ang ulo ko habang patuloy sa paghikbi. Wala akong lakas na tumayo pang muli o kaya ay makipag-usap sa kahit na sino sa ngayon. It was a shame that when I finally had the courage to talk about Leo to Lean because I thought she could help me understand him more, this happened. I looked for Cherinna to tell him about him, too, but what did I find out?
Silang dalawa ni Jahann...
Kung kailan susubukan ko na mag-open up sa kanila tungkol sa nangyayari sa akin ngayong mga nakalipas, ito pa ang nangyari.
"Tangina," mariin na ikinuyom ko ang palad ko habang patuloy pa rin ang pagtulo ng mga luha ko. Hindi ko alam kung kailan ba ako titigil sa pag-iyak ngayon pero para akong sinaksak sa nalaman ko. Kapatid ko sila, e. We grew up together! Paano nilang dalawa nagawa iyon?
I have no idea how long I stayed there, I just moved when someone held my hand.
Nag-angat ako ng tingin at nakita ko si Enzo na nakatingin sa akin. May hawak itong payong at sinisilungan ako. Para namang mas bumigat ang loob ko at mabilis akong tumayo at niyakap ng mahigpit si Enzo.
I am so mad.
I am so mad at them.
Naramdaman ko naman ang pagyakap sa akin ni Enzo ng mahigpit. Nabitiwan na rin nito ang hawak na payong kaya naman pareho na kaming nababasa sa ulan ngayon. Hindi ito nagsasalita ay hinayaan lang ako na yakapin siya na para bang naiintindihan niya ang sitwasyon ko.
Well, he's been here, but my case is different. Hindi naman magkamag-anak si Theon at Lean, si Jahann at Cherinna, magkapatid! Kahit saan ko tignan ay mali ang relasyon nilang dalawa.
"I hate them..." I sobbed while hugging him. "I hate them so much..." I buried my face on his chest as I cried my heart out because of the pain I was feeling. Napakabigat ng dibdib ko dahil sa nasaksihan at nalaman ko. Ni sa hinagap ay hindi ko alam na mangyayari ang bagay na iyon sa amin.
"Shh... I am here," sabi ni Enzo sa akin habang yakap ako ng mahigpit. I didn't say anything, I was just crying and sobbing while I was imprisoned in his arms. It was a good thing that he's there. He's always there when I need someone...
Hindi ako tinanong ni Enzo tungkol sa nangyari at kung bakit ako umalis at umiiyak ngayon. It was as if he understood that I don't want to talk about it and I don't want to share whatever it is with him. Hindi ko alam kung paano...
What happened the next day was the worst. Jahann admitted his feelings in front of everyone! Hindi ko akalain na may lakas ito ng loob na sabihin iyon sa harap ni Mommy at ng mga kaibigan namin.
Everyone looked so surprised aside from Kol and Enzo, though I already thought about it. Natural lang iyon dahil kaibigan nila si Jahann...
Gusto kong matawa na parang nasa isang palabas ang buhay namin at hindi ko maintindihan ang nangyayari pero nasa realidad ako at kailangan kong harapin ito.
Hindi ko na naiintindihan kung ano ang nangyayari sa aming lahat ngayon...
"Are you okay?" Enzo sat beside me and gave me the water bottle as he looked at me. Nagpunta ngayon si Jahann at Cherinna sa ospital dahil sa DNA test na nirequest ng mga ito para mapatunayan kina Mommy at Daddy na ampon si Jahann.
I still think that was absurd. Para lang masabing pwede na sila ni Cherinna, gumagawa ng ganoong kwento ang lalaki. Why can't they just admit what they did is wrong? Bakit kailangan pang mas gawing complicated ang lahat?
"Am I?" I looked at Enzo. Ni hindi ko magawang ngumiti ngayon. Para bang napakamahal ng ngiti ngayon at kahit anong pera pa ang mayroon ako, hindi ko magawang bumili para sa sarili ko.
Enzo sighed and shrugged. "I know you're hurting, you hate them, you're angry," sabi ni nito habang nakatingin sa malayo. "I won't tell you to understand them and accept them because you should heal first, Alyanna," dagdag nito. Napatingin naman akong muli sa kanya.
"How can I accept it? I am hurt, Enzo," pag-amin ko sa kanya. "I don't even know what's happening to us... hindi ko alam kung paano ko sila kakausapin, hindi ko alam kung kaya ko bang tignan si Cherinna sa mga mata, si Jahann... it was as if my life was turned over and over and over by what's happening..." I looked at Enzo and he was just looking at me, listening to what I was saying.
"Hindi ko alam kung paano ko tatanggapin, e. Was I a bad person? I know I did things, I cussed a lot, but I am not a bad person..." muli akong nagyuko dahil nag-iinit na muli ang mga mata ko at nagbabadya na naman ang mga luha ko. Hindi ko na rin alam kung ilang beses na ba akong umiyak simula noong nalaman ko ang tungkol sa kanila.
I may still be mad, but I am also hurt...
"No one is rushing you to accept it, Alyanna. No one should ask you that, your feelings are valid, you have the right to be mad and to get hurt."
I looked at Enzo again. "Your feelings are valid, so were theirs."
Hindi ako nagsalita habang nakatingin lang sa lalaki. "I know you feel bad towards them and you hate them, but it will never be a valid excuse to hurt them, Alyanna. I know you, you will hate yourself if you keep on hating Cherinna and Jahann because you love them. You can just avoid them if that's what you need, but don't make any decisions when you are mad because there's a huge chance you will regret it..." mahabang sabi ni Enzo sa akin bago hinawakan ang kamay ko at pinisil iyon. "In case you feel you are alone, I am here. You can always talk to me, I will listen to you," sabi nito sa akin bago maliit na ngumiti.
Tumango naman ako ng marahan sa lalaki bago isinandal ang ulo sa balikat nito. I know he has a point. If I keep on hating and saying things to them, there's a huge possibility that I will hate myself, too, because I hurt their feelings...
"I hate you, too, you know?" mahinang sabi ko habang nakasandal kay Enzo. We never talked about it. Hindi ko siya kinompronta tungkol kay Jahann at Cherinna dahil tanging si Enzo lang ang naroon para sa akin.
"Yeah, I know," he chuckled and squeezed my hand.
Nang mga sumunod na araw ay parang hindi ko na makilala pa ang bahay namin. My mom's crying every night, I could hear her and my dad talking...
As much as I wanted to talk to her, I couldn't do it, either. She's in pain knowing Cherinna is not her real daughter, not my twin sister.
The DNA Jahann insisted turned out positive. He's an Anderson, Cherinna isn't. Anak siya ni Hugh Alcantara, ang kinilalang tatay ni Airi. Kahit naman ako ay hindi ko lubos na maintindihan ang nangyari sa pamilya namin sa isang iglap lang.
We were all okay and now, Cherinna chose to leave. Sasama na ito sa totoong mga magulang nito. Gusto ko siyang kausapin pero pinili kong isara ang pinto ko sa kanya dahil hindi ko kayang makita si Cherinna na aalis...
Hindi ko kayang makitang iiwan niya ako...
I know she was hurt, but I was, too... hindi ko alam kung paano ko siya papanuorin na umalis at iwan ako.
Alam ko na nasaktan ko siya sa mga nasabi ko, sa mga nagawa ko sa kanya nang mabunyag ang katotohanan sa kanila, pero hindi mababago ng lahat ng iyon na mahal ko si Cherinna at masakit sa akin na umalis siya.
Airi lived with us and I know Cherinna felt alone, and I couldn't do anything about it. I was consumed by my own feelings, I never thought she would choose to leave us...
Not until she finally did.
I was hard on her, I was cold on her, and I regret doing that, but at the same time, I don't know what I should do to talk to her. The last time we went to their house, I think I became rude so I don't think I can go there anytime soon...
"Alyanna," Airi looked at me and she smiled a little. "I know things are not easy to understand and it's not easy to accept, but I think Cherinna really loves you," sabi nito sa akin habang nasa loob kami ng kwarto ko.
Nilingon ko naman ito at pilit na ngumiti ng tipid.
"I am hoping one day, you will be able to talk again, you know? Just like before..." tumabi ito sa akin at hinawakan ang kamay ko. "I am happy to finally meet you, to be with you because I never felt what it was like to have a sibling because mommy and daddy's first born died at a very young age... ngayon, I have you and Jahann..." sabi nito sa akin.
Tinignan ko naman si Airi at napatango ng marahan. Hindi naman talaga niya rin deserve na hindi ko pakisamahan ng maayos dahil wala naman itong kasalanan sa nangyari. She's nice, and Cherinna and I both agreed before that we like her...
Kaya pala magaan ang loob ko sa kanya dahil kapatid ko siya.
Siya pala talaga ang kakambal ko.
I visited Lean when Airi asked our parents if she could visit Tito Hugh and Tita Hannah. I have learned to call them that as a respect for them since they took care of Airi. Isa pa, hindi naman talaga tama kung tawagin ko lang sila sa pangalan nila.
I looked at my phone and saw messages from Leo. I sighed heavily as I replied to his message. Hindi pa kami ulit nagkikita simula noong magcancel ito ng lakad naming dalawa. We've been both busy with our lives. Sa pamilya ko, sa buhay niya. May kanya-kanya kaming naging priorities na dalawa.
He's constantly messaging me, always reminding me to eat on time and get enough sleep, and that is really frustrating.
With all that is happening to my life, I wanted him to be with me, check on me, make me feel like he's there for me...
Maybe I am asking for too much, but damn. I think Leo knows how I feel towards him. Hindi naman mag-iinvest ng oras ang isang babae sa isang tao kung hindi niya ito gusto at nag-iinvest ako ng oras at atensyon dito! He's the first person I really like! Dean was my crush before, but with Leo, it's different. I like him, and I like him so much, but it seems like he's not even aware of my feelings.
Is he that numb to feel that or he's just plain dumb?
"Why are you frowning?" Enzo asked me. He's wearing a white shirt. Bakas doon ang pawis ng lalaki. May hawak itong towel at mukhang katatapos lang nitong magwork out ngayon. Nasa may living room ako ng bahay nito kaya naman hindi maiiwasan na hindi ko ito makita.
"Wala," sabi ko naman dito bago mabilis na pinatay ang phone ko at inilagay iyon sa bag kong nasa may gilid. Hinihintay ko si Lean dahil nagsabi ito na magbibihis na lang para makalabas kaming dalawa.
I badly need a friend and I am kind of short on that area. Wala naman akong ibang kaibigan talaga maliban sa kanila.
"Why are you grumpy, then?" Enzo looked at me again and cocked my head. "What's wrong, Alyanna?" he asked me again. I looked at him and shook my head. "Wala."
Imbes na mainis gaya ng lagi namang nangyayari, nagtaka ako nang natawa si Enzo sa sinabi ko. Tinignan ko siya at tinaasan ng kilay. "What's funny, Enrico Lorenzo?" I asked him, still creasing my forehead.
Sa panahon ngayon, wala akong nakikitang nakakatawa kaya hindi ko malaman bakit tumatawa ngayon ito.
"You're cute when you are pissed off," he shrugged and chuckled again.
Mas napasimangot naman ako sa kanya bago inirapan ito. May kalahating oras pa akong naghintay roon bago bumaba si Lean kasabay ni Enzo dahil sasama raw ang lalaki sa paglabas namin.
Hindi naman na ako nagreklamo at sumakay na sasakyan ni Enzo, sa harap ako pinaupo ng mga ito dahil dadaanan daw namin si Theon ngayon sabi ni Lean.
We were waiting for Lean to hop in when Enzo reached for my hand.
Napalingon naman ako sa lalaki at kumunot ang noo ko sa kanya.
"Why?" I asked him.
Enzo turned his gaze on me. "I just like holding your hand," he simply said, which made me crease my forehead again.
"Huh?" takang-tanong ko sa kanya. Natawa naman ito ng mahina bago pinagsaklop ang kamay naming dalawa.
"There, it fits," he said so I looked at our hands. Napailing na lang ako at natawa ng marahan. "Ang baliw mo rin, no?" sabi ko sa kanya.
Enzo looked at me and nodded his head a little. "Maybe, but it really fits," sabi nitong muli sa akin.
Napatango na lang ako sa kanya.
"Oo na, it fits, hahawakan mo lang ba ako?" tanong ko sa kanya dahil ayaw niyang bitawan ang kamay ko.
"Why do you want me to kiss you instead?" Enzo asked me so I immediately looked at him.
He chuckled and squeezed my hand.
Ako na lang ang bumitaw nang sumakay si Lean, gusto ko namang matawa nang makita kong sumimangot si Enzo.
Ano bang problema ng taong 'to?
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: ZingTruyen.Store