Chapter 55: Beautiful
DS8Uncovered #LuMa #BearCouple #DaggerSeries
CHAPTER 55: BEAUTIFUL
LUNA'S POV
I gave Lucienne a questioning look when she suddenly stopped typing. Kanina ko pa kasi siya kinukuwentuhan tungkol sa amin ni Magnus dahil gusto niya na raw magsimulang mag-draft.
"Magkatabi kayong matulog ng ilang taon?" tanong niya.
"Yeah. Why?"
"It's weird."
I inclined my head to the side. "How is it weird? We're married."
"You love him, and he loves you, although he's hiding it from you. Pero kahit na mahal niyo ang isa't isa wala pa rin kayong relasyon. You're together, but really not together together. At least before kayo nag-aminan."
"Well... yeah?"
"So you're sleeping beside a man who is your husband, but only on paper. A man that you love but don't have any relationship with. At least not until recently." Nangingiting napailing siya. "Ang hardcore niyo rin talagang mga Dawson ano? Ang lakas ng trip niyo sa buhay."
"You're also a Dawson, Lush."
Hindi ako ang nagsalita kundi si Lia na may dalang tray ng pagkain at ibinaba niya iyon sa lamesa na narito sa pool area. Aside from my reading nook, I also love this area. Ito ang rason kung bakit dalawang palapag ang sinakop ng main penthouse namin ni Magnus. I wanted to have a pool and garden, plus the view.
While houses offer the view we have as well, it's different here, where we can see the beautiful view of Tagaytay from above.
Nginisihan ni Lucienne ang babae. "Iba pa rin kapag true blooded. Ako by influence lang."
Umabot ako ng fruit skewer at kumagat ako roon. "Para namang ang tino mo before. Kung hindi ka lang munchkin-sized iisipin ko siguro noon na nawawala ka naming kapatid."
"Nawawalang kabiyak lang ng kapatid mo." Kumindat siya at kumembot-kembot sa kinauupuan niya na parang inaasinang bulate. "Kaya nga intense ang combination namin."
"Buti na lang matino ang mga pamangkin ko," napapalatak na sabi ko.
Binato niya ako ng ubas na naabot niya natatawang sinalo ko lang at sinubo.
"Speaking of pamangkin..." panimula niya.
"Hmm?" Nang hindi siya sumagot ay pinakatitigan ko siya. Pagkaraan ay nanlaki ang mga mata ko. "Omg! Are you pregnant? Dalawa na ang buntis natin? Ikaw at si Circe?"
"No!" Nagpakawala siya ng hininga. "I was thinking about what Ember said before."
"About adoption?" tanong ni Lia.
Tumango ang manunulat. "I'm not that young anymore—" Nang mukhang aangal kami ay inangat niya ang dalawang kamay niya tanda ng pagsuko. She's in her thirties. That's not old. May mga nagkakaroon nga ng anak na nasa forties na. "Okay, fine. That's not just it. You all know that I'm adopted, right? I've searched about what Ember said, and it turns out there's two million orphaned or abandoned children out of one hundred nine million in the population. Pero one hundred fifty lang ang naampon. I was one of the lucky ones. Despite what I've been through... I was lucky to have this. A beautiful life."
I couldn't help the soft smile that curved on my lips. For years, she's been trying to stay away from attachments. She didn't want to invest any feelings because she feared losing them when she was already into deep. She was like that before she met my brother.
One would think that we adopted her as we brought her into the fold. But we didn't. She just became naturally a part of us, and over the years, I have watched her bring more people to it. She was always ready to welcome everyone that would come into my brothers' lives.
Nilingon ko ang pamilya namin na nagkakasiyahan di kalayuan sa amin. Some of my brothers are with the women and children in the pool, playing whatever game they think of in the water. Ang iba naman ay kasama ni Magnus na nasa dulong bahagi ng kinaroroonan namin at nag-uusapan habang may mga hawak na can ng beer.
All these people have faced their own versions of nightmares. They've been wounded in their own ways, scarred, and stumbled upon the most ill-fated moments of their lives... and yet here they all are... here we all are... being a part of a whole.
We were all just fragments, after all. Alone, we were prone to breakage. But together, we became something beautiful. A beautiful life.
"You should do it," I told her.
"I haven't really talked about this with Thorn—"
"He'll say yes. You wanted to have three children, right?"
"Wrong. Thorn wanted eight children. I negotiated, and we agreed to have three."
"Oh, I remember reading that," natatawang sabi ni Lia.
A blurry memory of the scene in Lucienne and Kuya Thorn's book flashed in my mind. Eight. Grabe rin 'tong si Kuya eh. Akala mo siya ang manganganak. "But you didn't really want three?"
Umiling ang babae. "Actually, nang mga panahon na iyon hindi ko pa nga ata naiisip 'yon. Advance lang talaga ako mag-isip dahil ang lakas ng tama ko sa kapatid mo. But I haven't really thought about having a child, much less three children. But the moment I had Cookie, I just knew that I'd be happy to have more."
"Yeah," Lia murmured. "I know what you mean."
Lia and Kuya Gun have been trying. Lia's twins were already miracles. It's not easy for her to get pregnant, and she already lost a baby before.
"Dadating din 'yan." When their eyes turned to me, I gazed at our big family. "The babies you both want will come at the right time. Sa paraan na nakatadhanang dumating sila."
"What are you girls talking about?" tanong ni Ember na umahon mula sa pool at lumapit sa amin. Kumuha siya ng tuwalya at binalot niya iyon sa sarili niya bago siya tumabi kay Lia.
"Babies," Lucienne answered.
"Oh."
"Are you planning to have another one too?" tanong ni Lia.
She shook her head. "Not at the moment, but maybe someday."
"Ang dami mo rin kasing anak bukod kay Lush Jr," sabi ni Lia.
"That too."
"Speaking of your babies, Ember," I cleared my throat. "That big white dog..."
"The dog that I'm keeping and waiting for you to name?"
Nangingiting pinaikot ko ang mga mata ko. Hindi na ako nagtataka na alam niya ang tungkol sa encounter ko sa aso na nasa sanctuary niya. "Yes. That one."
"Do you want to take him?"
"Not yet. I... I want him for someone else."
Nagsalubong ang kilay niya. "What do you mean?"
"It's not really a good time for me to get a dog. But one day... you know... maybe Magnus will need someone to stay with him. One that is a giant ball of cuteness that has four legs."
The emotions that flashed not just on Ember's face but also on the other women's faces were so visible that I could feel them in the air.
"Luna," Ember whispered softly.
"Or when my health is more stable." Nagkibit ako ng balikat. "I think he'll love her."
"You'll love her," she said firmly.
I didn't say anything, and I just nodded. It's not like she's wrong. I know I will love her. Maybe I already do.
"Tita Luna!"
Nilingon ko ang kinaroroonan ni Arctic na tinawag ako. "Yes?"
"Sino pong favorite mo sa amin?"
I heard a few chuckles when I froze in shock at his question. Now, how should I answer that? "Uhh... si Tito Magnus niyo?"
Magnus, who was on the opposite side of the garden, grinned at me, and I winked. Which earned us a groan from my brothers.
"Sa amin pong mga pamangkin mo?" tanong ni Cookie.
Binigyan ko ng masamang tingin si Kuya Trace na nasa pool kasama ng mga bata at tatawa-tawa. Sigurado akong siya ang may pakana kung bakit ako nasa hotseat ngayon.
"Lahat kayo," sagot ko.
Ngumuso si Abrial. "Isa lang po dapat ang favorite di ba?"
"Hindi naman kailangan. Favorite ko lahat ng mga kapatid ko."
"Talaga po?"
"Yup. Maliban sa Tito Trace niyo." Binelatan ko si Kuya Trace na tatalunin ang tulis ng nguso ng pamangkin namin. "I love all of you just the same."
"Wouldn't that exhaust your heart?" Cookie asked.
I gave Lucienne a look, and she grinned. Exhaust. Grabe. Big word for a boy his age. "No. I have a big heart that has the capacity to love so many people. Kasi kung hindi, bakit ako bibigyan ng malaking pamilya? We were given the people we have because we have hearts that can love so much. So you're all my favorites."
Mukha namang nakuntento sila sa sagot ko dahil bumalik na sila sa paglalaro nila. I let out a huge breath, and I stood up. Sandaling napahawak ako sa likod ng upuan nang makaramdam ako ng pagkahilo pero hindi ko pinahalata iyon sa mga kasama ko. "I'll get ice for my drinks. Parang muntik akong ma-heat stroke sa pa-hotseat ng mga 'yon ah." Binalingan ko ang mga babae. "Ice, anyone?"
Nang tumanggi sila ay naglakad na ako papasok ng bahay dala ang baso ko. I went to the kitchen to get some ice, and when I was done, I was supposed to walk back out when I noticed a book on the reading nook that must have fallen when the children were exploring the nook earlier.
Napangiti ako nang makita ko ang pamilyar na cover. It was the cheating book that I took from Magnus' office years ago.
Imbis na lumabas ay umupo ako sa sofa at ipinatong ko ang baso ko sa lamesa bago ko binuklat ang libro. I should stay here for a moment. Baka naiinitan lang talaga ako kaya nahihilo pa rin ako.
I glance at the others that are still outside, having fun under the sun. I've been with them through a lot of happy moments. Countless fun vacations, I attended concerts with them, movie premiers, competitions, fashion shows, and so much more. And yet, simple days like this are precious too.
What Magnus said when he proposed to me entered my mind. That forever could be anything. Kasi ano ba talaga ang forever? Sixty years? Seventy? A hundred?
It could be anything. It could be just a second. It could be just this.
A beautiful life indeed.
MAGNUS' POV
"When's the wedding going to be?"
Tumingin ako kay Gun na siyang nagtanong. "As soon as Luna is ready for it. It could be today if you ask me."
Nakakaunawang tumango siya. The women probably already have plans and I wouldn't be surprised if they talked about those plans with Luna. Maybe I should tell them to do it fast.
I didn't want to hurry because of her condition. It's not because she has limited time, like she believed. I just want to marry her. Simple as that.
Our first wedding will always be memorable for me. Doon naman nagsimula ang lahat. But I want to marry her again because I want to do it now that there's no hiding anymore. That our hearts are finally on the same page of our story.
Bukod pa roon ay gusto kong makasama niya ang pamilya niya sa araw ng kasal namin. Kahit hindi niya inamin sa akin, alam kong isa iyon sa iniisip niya noong una kaming nagpakasal. I know how hard it was for her to get married the way we did, without her family by her side.
"We had doubts. Especially me." Thorn glanced at me. "We had doubts about you when Luna started showing interest in you. When you married her, those doubts didn't lessen."
"I know."
"You liked Lucienne."
"I did," I admitted.
"At some point, we all thought it'd be more than that. After all, you risked your life for her."
"Even if it weren't for her, I don't think I would change my decision to help her. Lucienne didn't have anyone before, since she never let anyone in. Except you. I was just her boss and sometimes friend."
"We know that now."
Dumako ang tingin niya sa malayo at nang sundan ko iyon ay nakita kong nakatingin siya kay Luna na nasa loob ng bahay. She's sleeping at the reading's nook, the sun, perfectly grazing her skin as if even the celestial body couldn't help but be in awe of her.
"That."
I looked at the eldest Dawson. "What?"
A smile tugged at the corner of his lips. "The way you look at her convinced us."
"You didn't look like a man in love with Lucienne," Pierce explained. "With our sister, you do."
I didn't say anything. There was no need to, because they were right. Isa iyon sa mga kinatatakot ko noong mga panahon na alam kong hindi pa handang tanggapin ni Luna ang nararamdaman ko.
She was scared of hurting the people she loves—the people that love her. Hindi niya iyon gustong dagdagan pa. Bagay na naiintindihan ko.
I try not to show it, but she was right. It's hard. It's painfully difficult to live every day trying to prepare myself for what is to come. She makes me unbelievably happy that it's so hard to imagine that I might not have it for long.
Naniniwala ako na gagaling siya. Naniniwala ako na magkakaroon pa kami ng maraming oras. But it doesn't mean that the other possibility never crossed my mind. It does. And when it happens, I try my hardest not to show it to her.
Not everyone might understand her ways, but I do. She wanted to protect her family in the only way she knew how. Even if it means carrying all the pain alone, if that's what it takes to shield them from the pain, even just for a little time, before the impending truth comes boring down, she'll take it. And she did.
Her family got the chance to have so many memories with her without needing to ask themselves afterwards if it would be the last. Years where they get to have her without those days being clouded by their worry, pain, or fear. She gave them that.
"Thank you."
I look at Thorn in surprise. "For what?"
"For being with her all these years."
"It's not something you need to thank me for. I will make the same choice a million more times if it's for her," I said honestly.
He nodded with a small smile. Umangat ang kamay niya at marahang tinapik niya ako sa balikat. For a quick second, he squeezed my shoulder as he held my eyes.
I didn't need his words for me to understand. He was giving me a thank you that was greater than the one he just gave me.
It was his approval.
I didn't know that I wanted it until this moment. Until he gave it to me. Dahil noon ay nakasentro lang ang lahat ng ako kay Luna. All I care about is her. I didn't mind if his brothers didn't like me.
But now I feel like I have gained something more. Something colossal.
"They're your family now too."
Luna said those words to me before. It was only now that I felt the heavy weight of the truth in her words.
"Puntahan ko muna ang asawa ko. Baka nakikipag-away na naman kay Trace," pagpapaalam ni Thorn na nakatingin sa direksyon ng asawa niya na kausap nga si Trace.
Sumunod sa kaniya ang iba na tinapik din ako sa balikat bago naglakad papunta sa asawa nila.
Ilang sandaling nakatayo lang ako sa pinag-iwanan nila sa akin bago ako nagpasya na pumasok na muna ng bahay. I couldn't help but smile when I looked at my sleeping wife, who seemed to be in a peaceful slumber.
I approached her and crouched low so I could stare at her beautiful face. Bahagya akong yumuko at hindi mapigilang idinampi ko ang labi ko sa kaniya.
"Wake up, sleepyhead. Sa taas ka na matulog."
She didn't wake up from sleep, not even budging. It's not surprising. She's been more tired these past few days. Mas mandalas na rin siyang mag-half day sa trabaho.
I brush my nose on the tip of hers. "LA, you'll get cold here." Should I just carry her?
Napangiti ako sa isipin. I did promised her that I'll carry her up the stairs as long as I can.
Kumilos ako para maiangat ko siya sa mga braso ko pero natigilan ako at napatingin ako sa natutulog na mukha ni Luna. Her eyes remained closed, as if she's in the deepest of sleep.
I lowered myself on the sofa, still cradling her in my arms. When I made sure that she'd be safe from falling, I reached for her hand and enveloped it with mine.
Cold seeped right through my heart in an instant as fear swirled around me, readying itself to consume me.
Inangat ko ang kamay niya at inilapat ko ang mga labi ko sa palad niya. Her hand, like my heart, is ice cold.
_____________________________End of Chapter 55.
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