27 | plan
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کم نگاہی سے توڑ دیتے ہیں
Monday 7:32am
"When did you get home last night, Hami?" Anisha Bhabhi asked over breakfast table and Hemayal took her time chewing her food before replying.
"Around two, I think. The flight got delayed half an hour." She replied, spoon held between the long fingers as it lingered above a bowl of cereal.
"And how was the trip?" Hadeed Lala asked, dressed up nicely in an immaculate suit, ready for the busy Monday day ahead.
The whole family was gathered around the dining table, the head chair vacated but the two sides were filled, occupied by members of Khakwani household. Morning light streamed in through the closed windows, blocking the harsh winds with determination and ease. Sun hadn't completely risen, promising a cloudy day ahead but Hemayal didn't mind.
The colder, the better.
"Busy," The one-word answer didn't satisfy her brother, if momentary concern flashing across his eyes was any indication, so Hemayal forced a few more words out, halting her mind from wandering to places she knew held pain and nostalgia. "But productive. The conference ended on a good note but one can just hope the beneficiaries stick to what we agreed on."
The elaborate answer seemed to ease Hadeed Lala who leaned back in his seat with a nod, raising the tea cup to his lips but careful eyes still settled on Hemayal. But by now, she had grown used to the concerned gaze which had become a constant ever since Dadu's death. With that thought, her eyes flickered to the empty head seat where her Dadu used to sit.
No one had dared occupying it afterwards, not even her father who sat in his usual place on the right, probably hoping that their action would make the dead man stay with them in some way - in any way - possible.
"Did you meet Ibrahim there?" Hadeed Lala's sudden question stopped Hemayal in her place, coffee mug frozen in her hand as her eyes went wide momentarily, all the memories from the weekend choosing the exact moment to surface.
Even her father and sister-in-law stared at Hadeed with questioned, confused stare.
"Yeah, I did," Hemayal managed to utter without choking on her words, gaze now reduced to a glare. "What were you thinking telling him where I was?"
Hemayal realized the harshness in her voice a little too late but by then, the damage was done. Everyone's eyes now shifted to her, brows drawing in confusion and worry and Hemayal cursed under her breath.
Great.
"I just...he talked about meeting you the day before and I told him you went to Karachi. He didn't call me to ask about you; the call was work related but one topic led to another and I told him. I didn't know we were hiding?" Hadeed Lala's brows were raised in obvious concern and Hemayal counted to five under her breath before trusting herself to utter anything.
"What work do you have with him?" Hemayal asked, ignoring her brother's last question.
"He wanted some legal advice. Why is that so surprising?" He asked.
"It's... you just didn't mention him before." Hemayal replied, going back to sipping her coffee with cool and calm exterior - her interiors anything but.
"I mention him occasionally, I think. You know we keep in touch." Hadeed Lala's brows were drawn warily and Hemayal managed a smile and nodded her head, choosing to not respond to the statement but Hadeed Lala wasn't done yet.
"So, where did you meet?" He probed and Hemayal sighed heavily, pushing the plate away and leaning back in the chair.
"Hotel. He happened to stay in the same one." She said with an air of calm she was barely feeling inside.
Allah, even the name of that man rattled her mind.
"Ooh, such coincidences." Anisha Bhabhi chimed and Hemayal shot her a glance before chuckling humorlessly.
Coincidences, her ass.
Nothing related to that man was a coincidence anymore, absolutely nothing - she had come to believe the reality fiercely. The confused woman had no idea if he was tailing her or had her continuously investigated, but one thing was certain - no such thing as coincidence was involved anymore.
It was just him being a creep and following her around.
"Yeah, amazing, isn't it?" Hemayal replied, a little too cheerfully but everyone was so focused on the topic that her expressions weren't given much heed.
"So, did you two talk about the future?" Shehryar Khakwani uttered and like every time he had opened his mouth to speak, he shook the world under her feet.
"The...the future?" Hemayal was smart enough to know what he meant but too shocked to respond anything but.
"Yes, the Rukhsati and stuff," he said simply and Hemayal felt goosebumps travelling up her arm and down her spine, her heart literally fluttering in her ribcage. "Why are you so shocked? You two are already married, didn't you think of it?"
Hemayal needed a moment to gather her rattled nerves and hazy brain but knew she had none. Whatever was required to say to her father to keep the idea of Rukhati as far away from his mind as possible needed to be said now.
"It...it didn't cross my mind. I've been so busy with the hospital and we've never been in that much of contact either." Hemayal said, the desperation in her voice too evident.
"Not staying in contact with him was your and Ibrahim's personal decision; we never interfered. But it's time you think about it, Hami. How long were you planning on staying like this?" Hadeed Lala said and Hemayal sagged her shoulders.
"Forever, I was hoping for." The reply crossed her mind but not her lips, her sweater clad shoulders feeling the chill.
"I just...I need some time to think this through. It's a big step." Hemayal managed to force some words out of her mouth, voice rough around the edges.
"I know it is but it was expected, right? And it's been a while since he moved to Islamabad from Karachi; I think it's the perfect time to go along with the marriage." Hadeed Lala said and Shehryar Khakwani hummed in response while Hemayal only fisted her hand beneath the table a little too harshly.
"Yes, Hadeed's right. I'll talk to his father about it." Her father said and Hemayal visibly shivered in her place before taking a deep breath and pressing her lips tightly.
"No, you won't talk to his father." Hemayal replied, having regained some of her previous calm.
"Why wouldn't I?" He narrowed his eyes as he looked at her daughter from across the table.
"Because I'm not ready." Hemayal replied, voice becoming clear with each uttered word.
"And when will you be ready?" Shahriyar Khakwani asked, voice becoming hard but that only resolved Hemayal's determination.
"I don't know but you won't talk to his father until I say so. You already forced this marriage on me; I won't let you force me again. I'm not sixteen anymore, Baba and nobody is goddamn murdered by you." Hemayal replied, voice ice, posture stiff before she vacated her chair with clenched jaw.
Ashen face of her father was the last thing she saw before she exited the room.
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Tuesday - 6:31pm
"You shouldn't have said that to him." Mehmal said as she casually sipped her coffee and Hemayal let out a long sigh before dropping her head in obvious defeat.
"I know," she sighed again, voice tired and regretful. "But he took me off guard, bringing up the topic of marriage out of nowhere. What was I supposed to do?"
It'd been a day since Hemayal's last encounter with her father which ended with her regretful but angry, and him shocked but hurt. She hadn't tried talking to him again, although the winds of remorse had hit her as soon as she had stepped out of the room; a full day where she had tried talking to her conscience, forcing it to relieve her of the tension but as always, it didn't.
And now as she sat in front of Mehmal in a dimly lit café in Islamabad, baring her soul to her, she felt another wave of guilt. She had crossed the line, she knew. Although her words were true, they weren't kind and bringing up a subject that had once torn their relationship was a low blow. She and her father had their fights and arguments but this topic was a foreign territory, one neither had dared breach ever before.
"Only I know would have sufficed, Hami," Mehmal said, eyes and voice compassionate and after Hemayal looked at her with wariness, she elaborated. "You know what's more bad than the mistake itself? Defending that mistake."
"You're right, I just...I should apologize, right?" Hemayal was all the shades of confusion and regret, relying on the only person she now knew who wouldn't intentionally harm her.
"You should but you can't; I know you. And with the troubled relationship with your father, it's more difficult. And it's all right, I can understand." Mehmal said kindly and Hemayal sighed, turning her head to look out the window, gazing far ahead at the dark sky and crowded streets, wind picking up speed and chill outside.
Why was her life so...so challenging?
"What should I do then?" Hemayal asked, not in the right frame of mind to make her own decisions.
"You can talk to Hadeed Lala, tell him your discomfort over the marriage and maybe he can apologize to Taya Abbu on your behalf." Mehmal suggested and Hemayal's eyes twinkled, a clear indication that she liked the idea.
"That's...that can happen, yes. Lala will understand, he always does, and Baba listens to him," Hemayal sighed, relaxed for the first time since yesterday and leaned back in the seat with a relieved exhale. "You're a life saver, Mehmal. You know that, right?"
"Yep, that I know," Mehmal gave her a lopsided grin and Hemayal smiled, genuinely after a very long time. "Anyways, are we going to talk about the real matter for which she actually summoned me here? What was that with, come here immediately, Mehmal. I have a plan, huh?" Mehmal mimicked Hemayal's words and despite the still prevalent tension in her, she laughed - a full, joyous laugh with head thrown back and eyes crinkling and cheekbones rising and wallah, she looked beautiful when she smiled.
But maybe she knew that and that's why she smiled so rarely or maybe it was just life that had robbed her of her smiles.
"Well, yes, Mehmal. I do have a plan." Hemayal replied, still smiling but pulling on thee serious demeanor she had perfected over the years.
"Regarding revenge from Ibrahim, I guess." Mehmal rolled her eyes and Hemayal shrugged her shoulders with an of course. "You're treading dangerous waters, Hami. I am worried."
"Mehmal, make up your goddamn mind; what do you want me to do? You want me to not forgive him and yet you don't want me to take my revenge either. What is it exactly that you want?" Hemayal said, genuinely annoyed by Mehmal's continuous disapproval of her schemes.
"Your peace." Mehmal sighed, disturbed with a frown marring her brows.
"I don't know what that is," Hemayal whispered, voice lost. "Forgiving him won't bring me peace; taking revenge from him won't bring me peace either. But if I have to choose one, I'll choose the latter. My peace is lost, I can't have it again but I can't let him live in peace either after everything he'd done."
"Alright, alright. I just...I don't want you getting hurt in the process." Mehmal replied.
"I am already hurting." Hemayal smiled, a broken smile with shards in her eyes and the whole damn world stopped in its tracks.
"Did...did you meet - " Mehmal's question was cut short when the door to the café opened and Danyal walked in, still clad in a suit from work, hair ruffled and eyes tired but a radiant smile as he spotted the two ladies.
"Assalam-u-Alikum," he said and both of them nodded before occupying a seat beside Mehmal such that Hemayal now faced both of them. "I hope I'm not late."
"No, right on time." Mehmal said with a smile as she gestured the waiter who came and after noting the order for another round of coffee and snacks, went back.
The three cousins afterwards got engaged in conversations concerning work, family and friends - trying and succeeding at maintaining a safe distance from deep and dark waters of Hemayal's life and the problems that had become a constant. But for how long?
"So, I was told you have a plan." Danyal said, finally steering the conversation in the right direction and both ladies nodded while sighing.
"Yes, I do. It's...it's difficult and complicated and a lot of things can go wrong. That's why I need your help." Hemayal addressed Danyal who only nodded in understanding.
"I will help you anyway I can, Hami, but are you sure you want to do this?" He asked and Hemayal literally groaned while dropping her head in annoyance.
"Yes, I'm sure. Can both of you stop questioning me that every damn time? If I weren't sure, we wouldn't be sitting here right now; if I weren't sure, I wouldn't have met him in Karachi." Hemayal said, voice and tone rising as she glared at the two people who sat opposite her.
"You...you met him in Karachi?" Danyal asked and Hemayal sighed, restraining her temper while nodding her head slowly.
"Yeah, I did. We went for dinner." She replied and cursed instantly because of the look on Mehmal's face - the wide eyes, parted lips, horrified expressions - she hadn't told that part of the weekend to her cousin yet.
"You...you went to dinner with him?" Mehmal asked, amusement now lacing the surprise.
"Yeah, we...we talked. He told me his side of the story." Hemaya elaborated, not knowing how to handle the two stunned people sitting in front of her.
"And you still want your revenge?" Danyal asked and Hemayal's wary gaze turned into a glare.
"Of course I do. It doesn't change anything," by the looks on their faces, she knew they didn't believe her so she further said with a sigh. "It really doesn't. He didn't tell me anything new, I knew all of the stuff before except a few things. And those few things, they make me judge his impulsiveness and rash nature a bit more."
"So, what's the plan?" Danyal asked, finally coming to an understanding that Hemayal wouldn't budge - no matter what they said, no matter what they did.
"Why did you think I decided to talk to him in the first place?" Hemayal asked, brow rising in question.
"Because you finally realized you were an adult and decided to handle the situation like that?" Mehmal mused but pressed her lips tightly when Hemayal shot her a glare.
"No, because I wanted him to speak." Hemayal smiled scornfully, her features tight.
"About what?" Danyal asked, leaning slightly forward in anticipation.
"About the motel, one where he held me that night." Hemayal whispered slowly, leaning forward too and a stunned gasp left Mehmal's lips, eyes widening fractionally.
"What do you plan on doing to the motel?" Danyal asked, confusion written all over his face.
"I intend on using it to get what I want." Hemayal replied with a forced smile and saw Mehmal shaking her head.
"So, now what? Did he tell you where it is?" Mehmal asked, her heart beating in her throat.
"Even better. He owns it." Hemayal smiled but it was farthest from being pleasant, one that sends a chill down your spine.
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hey, you guys.
i'm so sorry for the delay but i got in university and things got hectic. i hope you guys will be patient with me!
how was the chapter, though? what do you think is hemayal planning?
till next time,salam!
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